If you were sitting here with me, you would quickly take notice of the amazing silence. It is like paradise. I can hear the faint chirping of a couple of birds, a soft rhythmic breathing from my son fast asleep right next to me, and a car in the distance traveling about my neighborhood. And, here I am. Surprised I showed up for life today as yesterday knocked the wind out of my sails, and left me to dry up on a shore all alone. Or so I felt, to my core. Paradise, and silence, are rare around here, and I can't seem to get enough.

After months of tossing an idea around, keeping a daily log of "what happened" over the course of the day, and the slow unraveling of our strong family knot, our 3 year old was given a label. A label given that will stick with him for the rest of his life, a label that is nothing designer but comes with an expensive (from every angle) price tag. Not only does he carry a label, but he carries the weight of the eyes that feel the need to focus on him when he is in the spotlight of public, the eyes in front of the minds that pass judgment and present silent name calling. I look around at those busy paying attention to our world, our moments of chaos, and think "don't any of you have anything better to do with your precious time?" On the outside he looks absolutely normal, absolutely beautiful, with his full head of white hair and glittering hazel eyes, but on the inside there is a storm brewing and often we are walking on eggshells in the center of the storm. We all have handicaps and weaknesses, whether we are fighting OCD, neurosis, depression, or double-jointed knees, we all have something wrong with us. And, if you believe nothing is wrong with you, step out into the spotlight of others and soon someone will find what is wrong with you, someone is bound to label, name, or brand you.

Some of our greatest lessons come from those with great challenges and obstacles to overcome. Isn't it the special needs people who go above and beyond to do great, leaving legacies, and are remembered for their crazy talent born during dark, lonely nights? Maybe Einstein had autism.

According to Generation Rescue Autism Statistics and Facts:

• 1 in 150 children
• 4:1 ratio of boys to girls
• 1 in 98 boys
• Fastest growing developmental disability
• 100 billion annual costs
• In ten years the annual costs are projected at 200-400 billion.
• Cost of lifelong care can be reduced by 2/3rds with early intervention
• A family with a child with autism will fund 3 to 5 million dollars of services throughout the lifetime of the child. More children will be diagnosed with autism this year than cancer, diabetes, Downs Syndrome and AIDS combined.
• Approximately 1 million individuals in the US have autism

According to the Mayo Clinic Autism Symptoms include:

Social skills

• Fails to respond to his or her name
• Has poor eye contact
• Appears not to hear you at times
• Resists cuddling and holding
• Appears unaware of others' feelings
• Seems to prefer playing alone - retreats into his or her "own world"

Language

• Starts talking later than other children
• Loses previously acquired ability to say words or sentences
• Does not make eye contact when making requests
• Speaks with an abnormal tone or rhythm - may use a singsong voice or robot-like speech
• Can't start a conversation or keep one going
• May repeat words or phrases verbatim, but doesn't understand how to use them

Behavior

• Performs repetitive movements, such as rocking, spinning or hand-flapping
• Develops specific routines or rituals
• Becomes disturbed at the slightest change in routines or rituals
• Moves constantly
• May be fascinated by parts of an object, such as the spinning wheels of a toy car
• May be unusually sensitive to light, sound and touch and yet oblivious to pain

Autism affects not only the child, but the whole family. One source claims, 50-75% of marriages will fail when a disable child is a sum of the whole. Another source states it is easy for a whole family to live, eat, breathe, and think Autism and forget about proper self/family care, forgetting about a world that exists beyond Autism.

We all have shining strengths, and shouldn't our weaknesses and our handicaps be seen as a gift? It is a blending of our strengths and weaknesses that make us polished, or so is my hope. This just in: believing in someone and having someone to believe in makes all the difference.

The next time my son is having an "overstimulation meltdown" in public, I think I am going to throw out a temper-tantrum and give the spectators something to look at and talk about.

In other news:

Clerk gives man $40 from own pocket for insulin: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_odd_robbery_insulin

66 year-old pregnant woman: http://specials.msn.com/A-List/66-Year-Old-Pregnant-Woman-Elizabeth-Adeney.aspx?cp-searchtext=Elizabeth Adeney

Thomas The TankEngine helps Autistickids identify with emotions: http://www.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/05/27/autism.thomas.engine/index.html

20 things you didn't know aboutfat:http://encarta.msn.com/encnet/Features/Lists/?article=20ThingsFat>1=27004

Albino Dolphin spotted: http://news.yahoo.com/nphotos/Lake-Charles2C-La/photo//090527/480/13c42f12b2bc48ccb261275fcc6be97c//s:/ap/us_odd_pink_dolphin

White tiger kills zookeeper as tourists watch: http://www.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/asiapcf/05/27/tiger.attack.new.zealand/index.html